Uhhh,I'm feeling sick today...~I'm not feeling realy well.~It's called love sickness...Oh,God help me!It's all because of you,Ryu...But i love you even more and more and more!Sun and moon can stop shinning,and stars fall off the skies,but my love for you,will never ever end!~~I wish I was now in Japan,even though i know it wouldn't change a single thing!~~I should love Ryuichi Ogata of w-inds.,not Ryuichi Ogata,the MAN.But I love both,and i can't help it!~~~I knew everything about you...!But how could i not imagine that the inevitable would happen?Having a gf.
And so suddenly,felt like it was the end of a beautiful dream...My heart was pierced.And although it hurts unbearably,it's still bleeding love.This wild love,protective and tender love,at the same time,which knows no end!This is my destiny.To love and not be loved.This my destiny,to be alone,because i've chosen it to be this way.Because of you,I am who i am,i have love in my heart.I believed,I dreamt,I smiled.And fact is,even though you were always far away,you did never let me shed a sad tear for you.All the tears i've ever cried for you,were of happiness.Yes,of happiness!Now,a heart which one day was singing its love for you,cries in pain for the first time.Pain,and sadness,for not having been there for you,near you...Although I tried to express my truest feeling and inner heart to you,And even though you probably got to know who i was somehow,for you,i was always and forever,innevitabily a crazy fan like many others you have.But then again,i cannot blame you,as you didn't ever get the chance of knowing me closer.It was not your fault.I should have grabbed my things,and fly to Japan,at the very first day i saw you.I should have fought for my love and my dream,even if it seemed impossible.But well,at least,i could say,"I tried!".Sadly,this was not the case,and now,I cry with a shattered heart.Hopes & dreams can become true,but they can also vanish in the wind,just like a twinkle of an eye.Love is cruel,life is cruel.Just like you said once: "Life's a bitch,then you die.".It's very much like it.Unbelievably,I've been loving you dearly & madly for all these long 10 years.If you ask me,I have no regrets.I would have done the same things all over and over again,if i had to.You were always my "Sunshine in the Sky".You still are and you will always be.Still,I don't know why,I will never ever give up on you,and my love for you is immortal.It's true that I'm feeling so miserable today...in fact,broken-hearted.But,as i have always said,love is acceptance,and resilience.I always said,that no matter what you would do,i would always love you and respect your decisions.NOW,is the time to prove it.Even though my heart is bleeding,it will always accept you and love you,no matter what you do.I am here,still,and i will always be here to support you.Being this in your career or in your private life and choices.I am here,my baby...as i have always been!My pain is my trophy,because it shows my love for you!My life is yours,and so is my heart and my soul.I know it's not much,but it's realy all I have!What can i say more that you already haven't heard...?what can i say more to take your heart away...?However,I just want to see you happy and smiling,so that i can keep smiling.The deal is:You smile,I smile!You cry,I cry!So,keep yourself happy,because i don't want to be sad and crying.Whatever you do,whatever your choices are,just smile!Because,baby,even worse than the pain of seeing you with somebody else,would be myself knowing that you could possibly be suffering.Because you are my all.You will always be my all.Life without you,is not life.there is no colour,there is no love,there is no joy!I don't have many more words...Just my feelings to share with you.My love,my heart,my soul...Hear me out...Hear me out...Just hear the sad words of a sad fan and woman who would give her life to defend you.A woman who would give her life for you!...When i say the words I LOVE YOU,I mean what i say.I don't mess with people's feelings.And even less so,with your feelings...I LOVE YOU,from the bottom of my heart...I LOVE YOU,RYUICHI!!!~
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